Monday, May 30, 2011

My Dance Recital. As told by Miss Thing

I had a dance recital on a stage at a theatre.

I got to wear a tutu and flowers in my hair

I did a ballet run to get to my spot and then I waited for everyone else.

We all danced together.

That's me doing a spin.

After I did it I had to check that I was still in my spot.  
Miss Michelle taught us how to check while we were dancing.  

It's called a bow.

That's Santi next to me.   He was the only boy in our class.

This was the part where we took four steps to the side and four steps back.

and then checked to see if we were on our spots again.

After some more dancing I got to do one more turn and did a ballet run off the stage.

My favorite part was all the flowers.

Everybody came to see me dance and they brought me flowers.

I still have some in a cup in the kitchen.

Can I go put on my tutu now Mama?

Monday, May 23, 2011

Chicken Sh#$ Bingo

A few months ago I was sitting around with my friend Jana chatting about our need
to have a party.  Really I was whining that I wanted to have a party but couldn't come 
up with a decent idea to save my life.

"We ought to play Chicken Sh$% Bingo." She says blithely

And my inner party planner jumped up and started cheering.

You see we have chickens, 
I have some plywood and could make a bingo board pretty quickly, 
and most importantly said chickens actively participate in the necessary
bodily function needed to play Chicken Sh*# Bingo.


Except it just wasn't enough... What fun is a party without costumes?

The answer to that question is No Fun at All!

A Mother's Day Chicken Sh*# Bingo party would surely clash with our guests schedules for lavishing love and gifts (non excrement related gifts at least) on their mothers.  
And really Mother's Day doesn't scream costume.

This left us with Kentucky Derby weekend.

I love hats and hats can definitely be turned into a costume and 
so the Kentucky Derby theme was decided.

That is until Hero Husband questioned the compatibility of the 
Kentucky Derby and Chicken Sh^@ Bingo.

"Really Mama" he said "Chicken Shi*% Bingo is pretty white trash."

He's a genius I tell you!  And so the party with the longest title ever was born

The 1st Annual White Trash 
Kentucky Derby Chicken Sh%^ Bingo Party

After everyone had eaten and enjoyed a few mint juleps we (meaning Hero Husband)
wrangled a hen from the coop and explained the rules.

Everyone is given a number,

a human of the female persuasion is required to blow on the chicken's posterior for luck,

and then the chicken is set on the board and left to do her duty.

Important to remember for future rounds of Chicken Sh#% Bingo is 
that chickens like to go to sleep when the sun goes down.

The girls were a bit dazed and sleepy.

Everyone cheered for their number encouraging the chicken to find their
spot before allowing a Bingo to be called.

Alas a chicken only $#its once, at least during this game and we could only have a few winners.
The girls did their jobs and it was decided.

At which point I realized that Hero Husband had conveniently gone missing and I had to wrangle two hens and escort them back to the coop in my black patent leather pumps and feathery derby hat.

Apparently it was a site to see.

T-shirts were handed out to those lucky bingo winners

and for the guest deemed to have the "best" Derby hat.

A party like this is a great way to confirm that our friends are just as strange as we are.

And we can't wait to do it again next year!

Thursday, May 05, 2011


After we left Forney it was on to McKinney for the main event of the weekend.


I'll begin by telling you that I love music.  

I have maybe one little tiny bone in the pinky toe of my left foot that has any musical ability.  
This lack of ability I think gives me a more profound appreciation for those with musical talent.  
At least that's what I tell myself.

Jewel is an amazing artist.  She has talent just bursting out of her.  

Unfair really if you think about it, considering the size of my pinky toe and all, except that she is also by all accounts a pretty freaking decent person and she shares her gift with us.

Over the years she has put on what are called EDA events.  
Limited entry, free concerts for those EDA fans.

EDA's are Every Day Angels.  Casually it's a name for her online fans.  On a deeper level it is a community of people who love Jewel and her music and connect with each other through the group.  

This was my first EDA event.

In all there were about 175 fans and their +1's

There was a picnic for the EDA's to meet and hang out before the show.
Hero Husband and I had been visiting with family and running around and sadly we missed that part of the weekend.

Once we arrived we queued up and waited while everyone was checked in and given their autographed passes.   

And then she sang.

Wait.  That is such a profound word that lower case just doesn't do it justice.

And then she SANG.

And told stories

And picked super glue off her fingers

and talked to us

And gave away prizes for the fan who traveled the farthest (France if you were wondering)

and took requests

and introduced us (well at least me) to a musician we'd never met before

and took a yearbook photo with all of us in the background

and thanked us for coming

and sang some more...

3 and a half hours in all

joyfully and generously

all while very pregnant

None of it was top 40 radio popular, making it all the more special for those fans who helped her remember how their favorite song began.  It was a musical whirlwind romance for her EDA's who cherish the magic she makes musically for all its depth, range and lyrically evocative richness.

It was Texfest 2011 and it was a night like I have never had before.

Thank you Jewel and the EDA's for an amazing night!

Wednesday, May 04, 2011


Our little weekend away was off to a great start.  
We stopped and shopped in Forreston, 
watched the Wolf Pack play football 
and so it was time to meet up with cousin Brody.  

The doggy hellos out of the way and everyone settled down for a nice nap the two legged members of our little party went out for dinner at Bob's

The food was good and the company better.

Sunday morning after mass and brunch with Hero Husband, Miguel and his friends, otherwise known as the 14 best looking guys ever assembled, Hero Husband and I headed out for Forney.

We have been on a mission for a while to find the perfect piece of something interesting to hang on the monster wall in our living room.  

Hero Husband is convinced that an old door would be a great fit.  I think it's a great idea and considering the love he has shown me in our decorating endeavors I was thrilled with the idea.  

On our way we saw a disgruntled car owner.

Warning: Import car humor.

And then we arrived in Forney

Until this weekend I had remained blissfully unaware of the antique mecca that Forney is.  

I kind of wish I had never known.  It would have saved me a lot of money.  
I am trying to listen to what the 50 year old me would be saying if she were here.

 "Don't do it, Turn back now!" 

but I apparently don't listen to myself.  
As soon as we walked in the doors of De Ridders I knew it was all over.

Seriously people.  They had a real gypsy wagon for sale...and that was just the beginning.

I really don't want to be here after dark.

A stork carrying a baby in a pulpit.

This made me want to open my own diner.

Everyone needs their own British soldier right?

The steps and entrance to the gypsy wagon

I told you my ancestors were from Bohemia didn't I? 

Suitcases.  I made up a story for every one of them.

A Trout

Apothecary's table

Cuckoo clocks.

One of the doors we were considering

and another

Apparently the owner of the shop, who wasn't there for our visit, travels the world buying things for her shop.  I found myself unable to choose from the doors we liked best until I could talk to her and get the story of where they came from.

It will probably be hooey, but I can't wait to hear what she says.

Tuesday, May 03, 2011


In rushing me out of Bon Ton, Hero Husband wasn't stifling my vintage shopping compulsions just to be mean.  We actually had somewhere to be.  
Turns out some of the boys from his fire station play football with the Central Texas Wolf Pack.  Did you know there was a National Public Safety Football League?  
Well that makes two of us.  And now we all know something that we didn't yesterday.  

Yay Readers!

So we spent the last part of our warm sunny afternoon watching a motley assortment of firemen, police and EMT's smack each other around on a football field.

Welcome to Texas!

Our Wolf Pack was playing the Dallas Defenders who have a very cool logo and definitely had some home field advantage.

What they didn't have on their side though was Eli.

Oh, I forgot to tell you.  We took Eli with us.

He got to meet his first canine cousin, Brody, and have a sleepover. 

Eli has a weird sitting position.

I thought initially it was because that's what his posterior was demanding after his neutering had been something slightly more traumatic than the average surgical procedure that removes your testicles, but it turns out that he just likes to sit that way. 

I continue to be amused and so I continue to take pictures.

At some point near the middle of the 4th quarter the Wolf Pack was down and the line of scrimmage was right next to our seats.

We learned another little something about Eli.

He doesn't like it when people talk smack.  Namely football playing cops from Dallas talking smack immediately after a play that involved a fair amount of helmets cracking together.  

He jumped up barking in his growly baritone and put his feet on the fence.

Eli is something close to 6 foot 4 when he stands up like that

The players all jumped.  

I laughed.

And then the Wolf Pack decided that Eli must have bee objecting to some obviously bad call by the official and cheered for him like he was their mascot. 

Sadly, our sports mojo only seems works on professional teams and the Wolf Pack didn't win this game.

But there's always next time and we had fun

Go Wolf Pack!

Monday, May 02, 2011

Bon Ton

I scored tickets to a private concert with the ever-awesome Jewel and so Hero Husband and I dropped the kids with his parents and we headed up to Dallas for a wonderful little weekend away.

We started by stopping in at Bon Ton Vintage in Forreston

I found this amazing gem of a shop through another blogger who is similarly afflicted with a love for vintage...well, vintage everything.

They had everything I have ever wanted to find in a vintage shop

Huge quantities of vinyl,

books, old photos, suitcases, and then we got to the clothes...

and the hats and the handbags and the dresses and the...

excuse me I need to fan myself.

Hero Husband asked me if there was a chance we could be out in 20 minutes. 

At least that's what I think he asked.  I was already sprinting to the back of the shop when I spotted something shiny.  

We did have other places to go and so I managed to restrain myself.  It was an effort was unfathomable in its difficulty, but I managed.

Seriously people, clap for me.  

I left with only two bags, which in and of itself is miraculous.

Hero Husband has been warned that we will be stopping on our next trip to Dallas and there will be no time limitations.